Follow-up to juggling posting with ill health

For a while now, I’ve been off the radar completely as far as blogging and social media are concerned. This wasn’t something I was happy about. In fact, I felt as though I was letting everyone down, my blog readers, my Twitter followers, the people who attended the mental health chats I host. 

I wasn’t in a good way. I have struggled with both mania and severe depression and have been seen for a week by the crisis team because I was struggling with suicidal thoughts. Not only is it a miracle that I am writing again, it’s a miracle that I am still here at all.

I still have a long way to go and I really need to stop having such high expectations of myself. I have a house move to sort out ready for the 28th which could be an amazing adventure of university and city-life, or it could mean that I end up in hostels if certain things aren’t resolved soon. 

I am extremely nervous. Uni means so much to me, I’ve been accepted on the course, to get this far then miss out would break my heart. I feel like crying a lot of the time. I know I’ve made the best decision for me but it could mean that I lose all of my support and have nothing to replace it with. I’m just so desperate for things to work out for me for a change.

I know that juggling blogging with university and ill health, will be hard work, but it is something that I feel passionate about and want to do. 

I guess I mainly want to say thank you to the loyal readers and followers who have stuck around while i’ve felt so lost. You are such a huge encouragement to me and I look forward to getting to know you better in the future. 

About brokenglassshimmers

I’m 30 and have BPD and arthritis. This website will detail how I deal with my health issues, reading and writing. I am in the process of writing books and I will keep you posted about how that is going. I also want to run an online book club and writer’s circle. Please feel free to comment on the site and to let me know if there are any improvements or changes you would like to see. If you have any questions please do not hesitate to contact me.

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